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When you bury your brother

I buried a brother yesterday.  His name was Chris.

He was just 41 years old.

Chris wasn’t my biological brother- but a spiritual one. 

He was a member of my small group Bible study over the past several years.  Each Friday, a small group of us gathered in our neighborhood.  We read the Bible, discussed the meaning of God’s word and prayed for one another.  We shared our successes, our failures and our fears. 

Chris started coming soon after his initial diagnosis. We often talked about his treatment schedule and his numerous trips to the doctor. We often prayed for his treatments and family.

Through it all, Chris was a rock.  He wanted to be a good example to his three sons…when life gets tough, you keep going. He kept his job and worked as much as he could.  He attended family events and games even when he didn’t feel like it.  Once, Chris got home from an extended stay in the hospital- and left for a week at Disneyworld with his family the next day.  Chris didn’t miss anything, even when cancer had knocked him down.  He just kept punching. He just kept living. 

Chris was an example of being fearless even when staring uncertainty and death in the face. He wasn’t afraid. 

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand. Isaiah 41:10

For God gave us a spirit not of fear but of power and love and self-control. 2 Timothy 1:7

I sought the Lord, and he answered me and delivered me from all my fears. Psalm 34:4

What are you afraid of?  I’m afraid of failing. Failing my family…my wife, my kids. 

What’s it for you? Business? A relationship? Perhaps a fear of being exposed in some aspect of your life?

Chris taught me many lessons, but the biggest was how to face fear.  Even in the final days of his life, he had no fear. He was confident in his faith.  He had trust in his Heavenly Father. Chris was at peace- and it was incredible to witness. 

Please keep the family of Chris Williams in your prayers this week. Pray for his wonderful wife and three young sons. 

And pray that those touched by his life can honor Chris by emulating his courage and faith- even in the worst of circumstances. 

And as always, let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.  

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Running Away from Home


I’ve returned to the region where I was born and raised.  On a weekly basis, I’m seeing faces and visiting places that I’ve not seen in decades.

It all came full circle last Thursday.  I was set to talk to a group of high school seniors at a rural high school in northwest Tennessee.  As we pulled up to the school- I was overwhelmed with memories from over forty years ago.

My dad was a high school basketball and football coach in the area.  Some of my most vivid memories involve those games.  Sitting on the bench with the team.  Watching dad make coaching adjustments at halftime.  And the bus rides to the road games.  Yes- the lengthy rides on those long, yellow school buses to little towns all over West Tennessee.

And here we were….forty years later…pulling into a beautiful school that time had forgotten.  The football field, the tiny gym- even the shape of the oval parking lot- was all the same as when I was a child.

All at once I had returned to my roots.  It seemed that those forty years had gone by in an instant.  I thought about my parents, my relatives in the area and those great players on dad’s high school teams in the 1970’s.  It was a time of innocence for me.  Purity.

I’ve experienced quite a bit of “life” since then.  Disappointment, heartache and pain.  I’ve hurt others and done plenty that I regret.  Life’s much more complicated now.

But it doesn’t have to be.

“Yet even now,” declares the Lord, “return to me with all your heart, with fasting, with weeping, and with mourning; and rend your hearts and not your garments.” Return to the Lord your God, for he is gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love; and he relents over disaster.”‭‭ Joel‬ ‭2:12-13‬

God invites us to come home- regardless of how long we have wondered.  We are to bring our sadness and pain to Him….just return to Him with all our heart.  He’s “gracious and merciful, slow to anger, and abounding in steadfast love…”

Jesus has provided an avenue for a homecoming…and I’m grateful for this road home.

Please pray for me to become a more complete husband, father, son and worker as I transition back to this region.

And please let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.

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Mug shot 

Our daughter, Carson, is a beautiful young woman…inside and out.

If I can brag a little- she recently won a special senior superlative at her high school…”Most Likely to Brighten Your Day.”

But something interesting happened to her recently.  Carson went to a Walgreens to get a passport photo taken.  She looked at the camera and gave a big, natural smile.  Upon seeing this, the photographer told her that she wasn’t allowed to smile for passport photos.  He explained that foreign authorities felt that international travel was a serious activity- and smiles and frivolity weren’t allowed on the passport photo.

So she didn’t smile.  And as you can see from the photo- it came out like a mug shot.  

Carson later learned learned that the photographer was playing a joke on her.  There’s no rule about having a serious look on your face for the passport photo.  But there it was- the completed work showed my daughter without her trademark glow and radiant smile.

It appears that she isn’t so happy at all.

Doesn’t this happen to all of us?  We can sometimes get labeled by our failures…and a single action at a given point of time can linger with us for a long time.  It may be a failed marriage.  It could be a bad situation at work that has stayed with us for far too long.  A single instance can make a long-lasting impression.

But we are never labeled for our failures with God.

If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. I John 1:9

God is faithful.  He forgives.  His love cleanses us from past mistakes.  We don’t have to worry about the failures.  We have forgiveness.

This week I’m praying about the “mug shots” in my past.  I want to move beyond my mistakes, learn from them and become a more complete being in Jesus Christ.

And let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.

 

 

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Letters from home

img_1507We celebrated Valentine’s Day this past week.  My family did the normal things…preparing treats and cards for my son’s elementary school party, exchanging cards and- the best part- Hollianne’s baking.

My biggest surprise, however, came in the mail.

I arrived home after a long day at work and discovered a letter from my mom in the mailbox.  A hand-written letter that read:

“KS-  You have had my heart for 46+ years.  I think about you everyday and pray for you.  I appreciate your friendship and am so very thankful and blessed that you are my son.  God has been/is so good to us.  I love you- Mom”

I shouldn’t have been surprised.  Mom has told me that she loved me almost every day of my life.

But there’s something special about the written word that made this communication extra special.

I’ve got a family of writers.  I’ve got notes from mom tucked away from numerous periods of my life.

My dad is a letter-writer too.  He’s sent me letters for high school and college graduations, before my wedding day and to celebrate milestones in my marriage and career.  I cherish all of these.

We are called to encourage.

Therefore encourage one another and build one another up, just as you are doing. I Thessalonians 5:11

Jesus was the ultimate encourager.  He lifted those who were hurting.  He provided hope for the lost.

And He still does today.

You never know when an encouraging word- or note- can lift the burden of another.  Just like my momma did on Valentine’s Day.

My prayer this weekend will focus on being more of an encourager.  Please pray for me to be more aware of how I can lift the burden of another.

And let me know how I can pray for you.

God bless.

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Separation Anxiety

2017 brought a new job to the Carver household.  And it’s ushered in lots of change too.

My schedule is a bit hectic, as there are many new places to visit with many new people to meet.

It’s been exciting, but it has me traveling away from the family quite a bit. It’s required an adjustment, as Hollianne is trying  to juggle a full schedule with three active kids. 

We are all doing our part to make the best of the transition.

Well….one of us is struggling more than the rest.  Our youngest, Britton, is the most resistant to change.  It’s been hard on him.

One night he told me that his biggest fear is that our relationship would change…that he and I wouldn’t be as close as we are right now. 

His statement hit me right in the heart.  My little guy was worried about our relationship- and that less time together might change the way I feel about him.

But I assured him that a new job- or my limited time at home during the daytime- wouldn’t impact my love for him.  In fact, I pledged to work harder to make sure that we made the most of our time together. 

He’s experiencing what we’ve all felt at some point in our lives.  We have thoughts that some life event can put distance between us and someone we love.  Maybe it’s not time or distance- but hardship or a broken relationship. 

This world is filled with hurt and doubt, but there’s hope for the believer. 

For I am convinced that neither death nor life, neither angels nor demons,[a] neither the present nor the future, nor any powers, neither height nor depth, nor anything else in all creation, will be able to separate us from the love of God that is in Christ Jesus our Lord.  Romans 8:38-39

What a promise that is! 

Nothing can separate us from the love of God. Nothing.  There’s an unconditional love that is present regardless of our sinful actions and ways.  We are imperfect- and God loves us anyway.

Earthly relationships change. Eternal ones don’t.  We can rest assured that God will never leave us. 

So we have come to know and to believe the love that God has for us. God is love, and whoever abides in love abides in God, and God abides in him. I John 4:16

Please pray for me to be the best husband and father that I can possibly be this year. And let me know how I can pray for you.

God bless.

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When you forget your pants

img_0751I’ve been preoccupied lately.  Too preoccupied, perhaps.

New job and new responsibilities.  Lots of commuting.  Long days and many new people to meet.  A schedule full of meetings, too.

I realized yesterday that I needed to pack for three consecutive days on the road.  While packing for the trip, I decided to return some phone calls.  Admittedly, I was distracted with the phone conversations and not focused on packing what I needed for my trip.

I got to the hotel late last night and realized that I didn’t have my shaving kit.  No toothbrush or toothpaste.  No razor.  Nothing.

I had also intended to finish up a Bible study during some quiet time at the hotel.  Nope.  I forgot my Bible too.

Finally- I realized that I had packed my new suit coat, but not the pants.  Yep, I had 1/2 a suit.  No tie either.

I didn’t have time to go purchase new dress slacks.  I would have to go with what I had in my suitcase…a mismatched suit coat and dress pants.

I drew lots of strange stares at the conference today, for sure.  If I were trying to make a fashion statement- it was an epic failure.

Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth.  Colossians 3:2

Has this ever happened to you?  Trivial things fill our days and preoccupy our minds.  If we aren’t careful, we can get so busy that we take our eyes off of what’s truly important.  We have to stay focused.

Please pray for me to spend less time being “busy” – and more time focused on Jesus.

And let me know how to pray for you.

God bless.

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When your ear bursts…

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I ruptured my eardrum last month.

My travel schedule had been hectic- with numerous airline flights and several long drives over a 10 day period.  My sinuses and the crazy schedule had taken their toll on my physical health.  I was run down and tired.

And then it happened. I sneezed during a plane flight and it felt like my ear had exploded.  I doubled over in pain and tried to regain my balance- as dizziness and nausea overtook me.

The next several weeks were filled with numerous visits to the doctor, rounds of antibiotics and forced rest.  I struggled with balance issues and pain in my ear for an entire week.

Looking back- I could have taken care of this situation before it got so out of hand. I should have paid attention to my condition as it began to worsen and address the symptoms.

But I just kept pushing.

The wisdom of the prudent is to discern his way, but the folly of fools is deceiving. Proverbs 14:8

I often find myself pushing forward without taking time to examine what’s going on around me.  The stress of work or the worries of life can keep me distracted.

My prayer life suffers and my Bible study is hindered.  Other thoughts and activities dominate my mind and keep my from focusing on my walk with Jesus.

And then I experience a “rupturing” event that brings me to my knees.  I realize that I’ve not been spending enough time developing my faith and my relationship with Christ. 

Commit your work to the Lord, and your plans will be established. Proverbs 16:3

My prayer this week is to have better awareness of my walk with Jesus. I want to anticipate when I’m not focused or dedicated enough to prayer and study. 

And please let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.

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I wish I’d never been born

I’ve got a childhood friend that’s going through a difficult time right now.

His pain is coming from all angles.  Things aren’t good with his wife.  His job is a source of stress.  He’s in a difficult relationship with his parents.  He’s also experiencing some health problems.

It’s mid-January, and he’s already saying that 2017 just isn’t going to be a good year.

“I’d be better off dead….or I wish I’d never been born,” he told me.

It reminded me of a passage I recently read from the book of Job:

“Why did I not die at birth, come out from the womb and expire?” Job‬ ‭3:11‬

You remember that story.

Job was a strong believer of God from the Old Testament. He had it all…family, wealth, relationships and influence.  And in an instant- he lost it all. Everything.

And he wished that he’d never been born.

Eventually Job’s wealth, relationships, health and family are restored.  He’s blessed more than ever before in the past.  In his pain, he’s found a new outlook and life.

It’s hard to do, isn’t it? 

Life can be overwhelming. Tragedy and trouble hit from all angles. It can wear us down and leave us downtrodden and hopeless. 

We can wish we had never been born.

“And my God will supply every need of yours according to his riches in glory in Christ Jesus.” Phillipians 4:19

We have a great promise…a promise from Jesus that our needs will be met.  It’s just not on our time- but in God’s time. 

We can never know how our struggles might be preparing us for the future- equipping us to help others…or how to better respond to adversity in the future.

We can use our experiences to be an example for others- and help them with their troubles. 

Please pray for my friend to recover from his pain.  And let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless. 

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Adopted

I want you to meet my new friend, Ben.

Ben is a nine-year old black Labrador Retriever.  He’s had a rough year.

His owner died two weeks ago.  He’s had cancerous cysts removed from his legs, which have left some debilitating nerve damage in his hindquarters.  Ben has gained a lot of weight and has developed arthritis in his front shoulders.

So when we met last week, the dog I encountered was overweight, limping and in incredibly poor health.  And depressed.  He really missed his owner and the family farm where he grew up.

Hollianne and I agreed to foster him, as Ben had no place to go.

We were prepared to deal with the health issues,  but Ben’s depression was the saddest part.  He wouldn’t look us in the face.  Ben simply wanted to sleep or just sit by the window and look outside.

Sound familiar?

Life is hard.  We face sickness and sadness.  Unexpected blows hit us at every turn.  People disappoint us.

But there’s one constant for the believer.

For in Christ Jesus you are all sons of God, through faith.  Galatians 3:26

God loves us.  He sent his son, Jesus, to provide salvation for the sinner and hope to the downtrodden.

For my father and mother have forsaken me, but the Lord will take me in.  Psalm 27:10

We have hope.

Ben’s demeanor has changed quite a bit over the past week.  He loves getting exercise with the kids.  Our veterinarian has prescribed some medicine to help with his physical ailments.  But best of all, there’s a renewed sparkle in his green eyes and a constant wag in his tail.  The personality is coming back quickly.

I will not leave you as orphans; I will come to you.  John 14:18

When you are weary- remember the one who has promised hope for all of us.

Please pray for us as we try to care for Ben.

And let me know how to pray for you.

God bless.

 

 

 

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Praying with the Dead 

I had signed up to deliver Christmas baskets for the needy through our church. The idea was to take groceries, clothing and toys to families who were struggling financially.

But the end-of-year holiday crunch had caught up with me. I was facing a huge deadline at work and kept putting off the delivery of my baskets. So here it was…December 23…and I was hastily trying to get these baskets delivered to homes all across Knox County.

My heart wasn’t in it.

Carson, my six-year old daughter, and I had five homes to visit. Our instructions were to deliver the baskets and to pray with these families before leaving. At each stop I rushed through the prayer-thinking only about the next stop on the list.

Our last stop was in a desolate part of the county. The directions led me to a gravel road that curved up a mountain. After sunset we stopped in front of a battered, aging trailer. Surely no one lived here…

A frail woman opened the door and welcomed us inside. Her trailer was sparely furnished and very cold. I could feel gusts of wind pushing through cracks in the windows and doors. It was obvious that she lived alone.

She told us that she was facing a losing battle with cancer. She had been hopeful that her treatments would help, but rounds of chemotherapy and radiation had ravaged her body and weakened her ability to fight the cruel disease. She told us that she had a few months left to live.

It was a sobering sight.

I felt sorry for this woman- fighting cancer all by herself. I didn’t know what to say, as I was overwhelmed with grief.

Carson reminded me that we needed to pray. The three of us stood in her trailer and I said a soft, sad prayer for her.

Then it happened.

We were turning to go and she asked if she could pray for us. She took our hands and led the most beautiful prayer I’ve ever heard. She prayed for me as a husband, father and son. She prayed for Carson as a daughter and leader at her school. She prayed for family’s health and happiness. And she prayed for our “unselfish act of service” that night- and how much that visit had meant to her.

With all her pain and suffering- she thought of us. She prayed unselfishly for us while facing the reality of death.

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world. John 16:33

She told us that she had no fear about her circumstances. She had already overcome this world.

Carson continued to talk and hold her hand as I returned to the truck to get extra food we had packed. We wished her a Merry Christmas and headed back out into the night.

I fought back tears as we drove down that mountain. I was ashamed that I had approached this task with such a bad attitude.

We delivered food for her that evening, but she returned to us an even greater blessing. She gave us a gift of hope.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything by prayer and supplication with thanksgiving let your requests be made known to God. Philippians 4:6

I pray that we all have good attitudes this holiday season. I pray that we find someone to lift up during this time of year. Perhaps in doing so- we’ll be the ones who receive the blessing.

Please let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.
 

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