Tag Archives: Forgiveness

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A visit from Big Hank

I was sitting in a hotel lobby in Memphis a couple of weeks ago.  I was anxiously awaiting for a meeting to start- thinking about what might transpire over the next hour.  This meeting had the opportunity to be unpleasant.

I decided to try and relax.  I prayed a lengthy prayer.  I then took out my Bible and read through 2 Corinthians.

I later walked around the perimeter of the large lobby to think about how I would open the meeting.  How I would convey bad news and a disappointing outcome.

I returned to my seat and decided to pray again.

Then I felt someone’s hand on my shoulder.

Let each of you look not only to his own interests, but also to the interests of others.  Philippians 2:4

Standing in front of me was a large man.  He introduced himself as Big Hank.

“Are you ok?”

I told him that I was doing fine…just preoccupied.

He explained that he had been watching me for the past 30 minutes.  Praying, meditating, reading and pacing.  Big Hank said that he could tell that something was bothering me- and he felt compelled to come over and pray with me.  I told him I would appreciate the prayer.

And pray he did.  Big Hank said a short prayer for me- for my comfort, peace and future.

And as quick as he appeared, he turned and walked across the lobby- and outside to the busy sidewalk.

But if anyone has the world’s goods and sees his brother in need, yet closes his heart against him, how does God’s love abide in him?  1 John 3:17

Pray for me to have better awareness of the needs of others.  Help me to identify pain and hurt- and have the courage to engage and provide comfort.

And let me know how to pray for you.

God bless you, Big Hank- wherever you are.

 

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Everyday is a birthday

Last week I had the honor of celebrating a special birthday.  A close friend of mine became a “first time” dad…and I had the opportunity to visit his daughter soon after her arrival home.

Hollianne and I offered to deliver dinner.  Selfishly, the offer to provide food was just a means to an end…as we wanted to see their new baby!

She is perfect.  Big, beautiful eyes, smooth skin and delicate features.  Just perfect.

She’s a blessing, but she is blessed too.  She’s got an incredible mother and father that will provide for her physically, emotionally and spiritually.

For you formed my inward parts; you knitted me together in my mother’s womb. Psalm 139:13

We have that same blessing.  We have a Father who designed us, loves us and wants what’s best for us.

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Jeremiah 29:11

Tomorrow is my birthday.  I’m officially closer to 50 than I am 40.  And when I look in the mirror, I don’t see smooth skin and any delicate features…but plenty of lines and battle scars.

But I have that same promise of a heavenly Father who cares for me.  And you do too.

Therefore, if anyone is in Christ, he is a new creation. The old has passed away; behold, the new has come.  2 Corinthians 5:17

We all have the opportunity for renewal each and every day.  Thank God.

Let me know how I can pray for you this week.

God bless.

 

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Regret

Have you ever uttered words that you wish you could take back?

I often find myself saying hurtful things to the people I love the most.  Maybe it’s been a long day at the office.  Perhaps I’ve had a bad night of sleep.  Maybe I’m just frustrated with the kids.  Whatever the reason- I can be pretty insensitive.

Oh…it’s not yelling.  It’s much more subtle.  It can be a snippy, sarcastic remark. I excel at those, I’m afraid.

And later- I always regret those occasions.

I studied about regret this week.

Then one of the twelve, whose name was Judas Iscariot, when to the chief priests and said “What will you give me if I deliver him over to you?”  And they paid him thirty pieces of silver.  And from that moment he sought an opportunity to betray him.  Matthew 26:14-16

Judas was one of the original disciples.  He had traveled with Jesus.  He had witnessed the miracles and heard the teachings.  He loved Jesus.

But greed overcame him.  Judas delivered Jesus to the men that would eventually kill him.  All over thirty pieces of silver.

Judas soon experienced remorse over his decision.

And throwing down the pieces of silver into the temple, he departed, and he went and hanged himself.  Matthew 27:5

It was too late.  He let greed, jealously or any number of emotions overcome him…and delivered Jesus over to an angry crowd.

I can’t imagine how he felt.  I know I never want to experience regret like that.

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  Ephesians 4:32

My personal prayer this week is to be more tenderhearted- and live with less regret. Jesus wants it that way.

And let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.

 

 

 

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Now that I know how you really feel…

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I experienced a tough situation recently.

I was forwarded an email by a friend.  As I read through the email, I realized that there was a large portion of the message that I probably wasn’t supposed to see.

Near the bottom, there was an exchange between my friend and another person that wasn’t flattering toward me.  This third party (also a friend)  was venting about a decision that had been made, but it got a bit personal.  I realized that a) our relationship wasn’t what I thought it was and b) she was freely sharing her opinion with a large audience.

At first I was frustrated.  Why hadn’t she called and let me know how she felt?  We interact often, so the opportunities to talk were frequent.  Frustration then led to disappointment.  I wished that my friend would have talked to me rather than airing it to others first.

But I’m truly no better than her.  Truly.

Even before a word is on my tongue, behold, O Lord, you know it altogether.  Psalm 139:4

While I might not write it down, I have those same thoughts from time to time.  I’m frustrated with the actions of others…disappointed…and let my emotions get carried away.

But God knows.

In 1 Chronicles chapter 28 the writer tells us that God searches all hearts and understands every plan and thought.  We don’t have to write down our thoughts- God knows what’s written on our hearts.

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  Ephesians 4:32

I’m called to forgive.  I need to forgive, because God has forgiven me- a chief sinner.

Please pray for me to be a better example of grace with others.  I need it.  And let me know how to pray for you.

God bless.

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Cracked

Hollianne and I were recently driving back from a dinner when a semi truck threw a rock into my windshield.

The impact created a crack that was less than an inch long.  It was just a little scratch.

The scratch quickly grew.  The damage now stretches across my entire windshield and has started to splinter off in a couple of new directions.  It’s now difficult to ignore the damage when driving the truck.

Isn’t that a lot like sin?

I sometimes let anger or pride overtake me in a weak moment.  It may not be expressed outwardly, but it’s there…just beneath the surface.  And while it might not dominate my day- it stays in my head and heart…and I can dwell on it.

If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.  1 John 1:8-10

Left unchecked, this sin can spread and grow into other aspects of my life.  It can leave me bitter, unfulfilled and angry.  It’s noticeable to others.

And he said, “What comes out of a person is what defiles him. For from within, out of the heart of man, come evil thoughts, sexual immorality, theft, murder, adultery, coveting, wickedness, deceit, sensuality, envy, slander, pride, foolishness. All these evil things come from within, and they defile a person.”  Mark 7:20-23

My prayer this week is to recognize the sin in my life- and to have the courage to confront it before it overtakes me.

Please let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.

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So mad I could spit

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I got fighting mad last week.

Actually, I didn’t have good reason to be angry.  No one had wronged me.  Someone had, however, mistreated one of my friends.  Malicious, false statements were directed toward my buddy (let’s call him Stan)- and when the guilty party was approached about it- he lied about being involved.

The truth eventually came out, however, and the offender confessed to their slander and the lie to cover it up.

Truthful lips endure forever, but a lying tongue is but for a moment.  Proverbs 12:19

I was mad.  Angry.  I couldn’t believe this guy could have such a lack of respect toward Stan.

A couple of days after the incident, I had a long conversation with Stan.  I asked him how this would impact his relationship with this fellow.  His response caught me off guard.

“I’m going to forgive him.”

And he had.  As we talked, I could tell that Stan had a sense of peace about the situation.  Stan said that this fellow had experienced enough embarrassment from being caught in the lie- and that was punishment enough.

Stan had released any anger and animosity that he felt from the situation.

And whenever you stand praying, forgive, if you have anything against anyone, so that your Father also who is in heaven may forgive you your trespasses. Mark 11:25

Stan had chosen to forgive.  And if he could do that, I certainly should let go of my resentment too.

Be kind to one another, tenderharted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  Ephesians 4:32

My prayer is to have a more forgiving heart- and to ask forgiveness from those I’ve hurt.

Please pray for me and let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.

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Wounds from the battlefield

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I have a friend who has completed a couple of military tours in Afghanistan.  He suffered a battle scar that he’ll carry with him the rest of his life.  While the incident did not end his life, he’ll carry this visible, physical wound around for the rest of his days.

I have not talked with him about the specifics of the incident, but he’s said enough about it to lead me to two conclusions:  1)  it provides a constant reminder of the pain and suffering that war brings, and 2)  he’s decided to let go of any regret associated with the incident and move forward with a forgiving heart.

That’s hard to grasp, isn’t it?  He’s daily reminded of the painful experience, but he’s eyeing the future with a sense of peace and forgiveness.

We all have wounds.  While they might not all be physically apparent, they are often lingering beneath the surface.

Wounds from painful past experiences.  Wounds from times when we struggle to forgive others.

And wounds from not being able to forgive ourselves- which are perhaps the most painful of all.

How do we mend wounds?

First, we need to remember that we have a caring, loving God.

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.  1 Peter 5: 6-7

We also need to seek forgiveness- and grant forgiveness.

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  Ephesians 4: 32

And we need to fill wounds with prayer and other healthy activities…constantly seeking the presence of Jesus.

If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.  John 15: 7

I pray that you allow Jesus to address your wounds.  Mine too.

Please let me know how I may pray for you this week.  God bless.

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I’ve lost my son

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My son, JT, was gone.

Hollianne, the kids and I were living in a residence hall on the UT campus back in the winter of 2011.  We had just returned to Knoxville for my job, and we were living in Laurel Apartments until we could find a house.

It was a Sunday morning and Hollianne had gotten up early.  She peeked into the living room where JT had been sleeping on a couch.  He wasn’t there.  She looked in the spare bedroom in the apartment- thinking he had crawled into a bed with his siblings.  He wasn’t there either.

She then noticed that the door to the apartment was unlocked.  Panicked, Hollianne woke up the rest of the family and we began the search for our missing son.  We ran up and down the hallways of Laurel apartments- calling his name.  We asked the student worker at the front desk if she had seen JT…even called the campus police.  He was nowhere to be found.  We feared the worse…that he had wondered outside the building and into the Fort Sanders neighborhood during the darkness of the night.

Fortunately, a woman who was cleaning the study lounge emerged into the lobby and announced that there was a little boy asleep on the couch.  It was JT.  A review of the security cameras showed him leaving our apartment in the middle of the night and sleep-walking into the student lounge.  There he was- safe, unharmed, well-rested and lacking any recall of what had happened during the night.  It was the scariest 15 minutes of our lives.

Remember when Mary lost her son?  Luke chapter 2 tells about the scary situation when she and Joseph realized that they couldn’t find Jesus.  They had been visiting Jerusalem and Jesus decided to stay behind- without telling his parents.  They traveled back to Jerusalem and found Jesus teaching in the Temple…after a three-day frantic journey and search.

Mary also knew that she would eventually lose Jesus again to death.  John chapter 19 tells us that Jesus spoke to his mother, Mary, as he was dying on Calvary’s cruel Cross .  Can you imagine the suffering she felt watching Jesus endure such horrible physical and mental anguish?

When Jesus had received the sour wine, he said, “It is finished,” and he bowed his head and gave up his spirit.  John 19:30

But the story doesn’t end there for Jesus, for Mary…and for you and me.

John chapter 20 tells us about the stone that was rolled away from the entrance of the tomb.  And about the empty tomb…and about Jesus appearing to Mary Magdalene and the Disciples.  And of the incredible power that came to those that believed in Jesus…those that were committed to continuing His work to seek and save the lost.

If the Spirit of him who raised Jesus from the dead dwells in you, he who raised Christ Jesus from the dead will also give life to your mortal bodies through his Spirit who dwells in you.  Romans 8:11

The story only starts with Mary losing Jesus.  His awful death was the beginning of a great new story of hope and love and faith.  He lost His physical life, defeated sin and death…and on the third day He arose.  He arose and granted the ultimate sacrifice…the forgiveness of my sins.  I could have been His lost son, but He has fulfilled a great promise to continue loving and caring for me.  And for every one of you, too.

He arose.  Thank God.

God bless you all.

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Walk like an Egyptian…

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Sometimes I can be so stubborn.  I’ll admit it…I’m stuck in my ways.  My old habits and ways of thinking are often hard to change.

I have spent some time in the book of Exodus this week- and it’s given me some new insight into my resistant nature.  Moses had pleaded to Pharaoh on multiple occasions to let his people, the Israelites, leave Egypt.  Pharaoh’s heart was hardened, however, and despite plagues of frogs, gnats, flies, livestock, boils, hail, locusts and darkness- Pharaoh still would not let Moses and his people leave.  Egypt had been devastated with disaster upon disaster!  It finally took the tragic death of the firstborn of all Egyptian families for Pharaoh to relent and allow a passage out of Egypt.

During the night Pharaoh summoned Moses and Aaron and said, “Up!  Leave my people, you and the Israelites!  Go, worship the Lord as you have requested.  Take your flocks and herds, as you have said, and go.  And also bless me.”  The Egyptians urged the people to hurry and leave the country. “For otherwise,” they said, “we will all die!”  Exodus 12: 31-33

It was a pretty drastic wake-up call, for sure.

Upon reflecting on this situation, I realize that I’m truly no better than Pharaoh.  There are so many areas in my life where my heart has been hardened.  There are relationships that I need to mend.  Situations where I’ve been hurt and I need to forgive and forget.  Times when I have had the opportunity to show mercy- but my stubbornness and pride wouldn’t allow it.  In Pharaoh’s case- God had hardened his heart.  I don’t have this excuse.

Whoever conceals his transgressions will not prosper, but he who confesses and forsakes them will obtain mercy. Blessed is the one who fears the Lord always, but whoever hardens his heart will fall into calamity.  Proverbs 28: 13-14

Let us all search our lives (and hearts) for those areas where we need to change.  And pray that we have the courage to address these areas.  I need your prayers in this regard.

As always, let me know if I can pray for you.  God bless.

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Imposter

Naples

I spent three days in Naples, FL this week.  My conference was set near the beach, and it was a struggle to sit in the sessions while looking out at the gulf, the sunshine and the palm trees.

The reality, however, was that it was still January in South Florida.  The temperature was unseasonably cold.  There was a 35 mph wind gusting off the gulf.  It was miserable.  Appearances can be deceiving.

There are times in my life when I’ve felt the same way. This usually happens when I feel insignificant, tired and defeated.  Times when I wonder why I’ve been so blessed with family and friends.  Times that I feel like I’m barely holding it together. When I’ve felt like this, it’s typically because I’ve been comparing myself to others.

For am I now seeking the approval of man, or of God? Or am I trying to please man? If I were still trying to please man, I would not be a servant of Christ. Galatians 1:10

Isn’t that what we do?  We compare our insides to what we see on the outside of others.  This will always lead us to unhappiness.

But the Lord said to Samuel, “Do not look on his appearance or on the height of his stature, because I have rejected him. For the Lord sees not as man sees: man looks on the outward appearance, but the Lord looks on the heart.” I Samuel 16:7

We need to focus on our heart health.

The aim of our charge is love that issues from a pure heart and a good conscience and a sincere faith.  1 Timothy 1:5

God cares about the condition of our hearts- not outer appearances.

Create in me a clean heart, O God, and renew a right spirit within me.  Psalm 51:10

Pray for me to be diligent in a continual search for a pure, clean heart.  And let me know if I can pray for you.

God bless.

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