Author Archives: kcarver1970

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Kicks that sail wide right

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Our son, Jack Thomas, is a kicker for the West middle school football team.  He’s learned something about kicking…you are only as good as your last attempt.

If any aspect of the snap, hold or kick aren’t perfect, then bad things happen.  It’s a game of inches…and it’s easy for a small mistake to push the ball wide left or right.  Everyone needs to be completely focused.

It’s just like life, right?

Enter through the narrow gate.  For wide is the gate and broad is the road that leads to destruction, and many enter through it.  But small is the gate and narrow the road that leads to life, and only a few find it.  Matthew 7: 13-14

The path to follow Jesus offers lots of resistance.  Anger, bias, envy, selfishness and jealousy are distractions.  And like a kick in football, the slightest misstep can send us down a wide, destructive path.

No temptation has overtaken you that is not common to man. God is faithful, and he will not let you be tempted beyond your ability, but with the temptation he will also provide the way of escape, that you may be able to endure it.  1 Corinthians 10:13

Fortunately- we have a coach that can fill our lives with peace, love and hope.

The width between the goal posts is only 23 feet and 6 inches.  But as a good kick travels closer to the target, the distance seems to grow much wider.  It takes practice.  The same is true for life…good practice makes it easier to deal with life’s obstacles. Prepare for life’s journey with scripture and prayer.

Please pray that I may better deal with distractions in my life.  And let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.

JT football 2015

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What to do when your neighbor is dying 

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Our neighbor has died.

John had been sick for some time. I hadn’t seen him in almost a year, as cancer had weakened his body and trips outside the home had become few and far between.

One day I saw a number of cars in John’s driveway. His wife, Grace, met me in my front yard and let me know that hospice had moved in. She asked if I would like to say goodbye to John.

I was embarrassed.  I had often asked Grace about John when seeing her out in the yard. I had not, however, visited with John in a long time. I had prayed for him for a year- but I hadn’t prayed with him. I had failed him.

I went into the house and said a silent prayer for John as he slept peacefully. He died late that evening.

And the dust returns to the earth as it was, and the spirit returns to God who gave it.  Ecclesiastes 12:7

I have since wondered about other neighbors in the same condition.  Not just those who are physically sick, but those who are spiritually troubled.

People with heavy hearts, tired souls and troubles that give them little hope.  Maybe it’s a bad relationship.  Perhaps depression.  Or maybe life has dealt them so many blows that it’s just hard to keep going.

These are our neighbors.  They need our engagement in their lives.  They need hope.

And after you have suffered a little while, the God of all grace, who has called you to his eternal glory in Christ, will himself restore, confirm, strengthen, and establish you.  I Peter 5:10

I pray for a greater awareness for pain and struggles that others may be dealing with.  I pray that I can help a neighbor with their burden…and that someone might have the awareness to help me when I am struggling.

Please let me know how to pray for you.  God bless you.

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Shots fired at home

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I seem to be on my worst behavior at home.

After a long day of work or a couple of days of travel- I’m often exhausted by the time I get to my house.

Our home should be a place of solace and rest.  A time to reconnect with my incredible wife and three great kids.  But I often let the stresses of the day continue to linger when I come home.

I can be short…dismissive.  Moody.  Quiet and reserved.  Withdrawn.

Dozens of tiring, negative thoughts preoccupy my mind and can keep me from fully engaging with my family- those that love me most.

Know this, my beloved brothers: let every person be quick to hear, slow to speak, slow to anger; for the anger of man does not produce the righteousness of God.  James 1:19-20

My behavior demonstrates a lack of spiritual maturity on my part.  My family deserves my best.

One of my favorite verses to help me cope is found in Proverbs.

Whoever is slow to anger is better than the mighty, and he who rules his spirit than he who takes a city.  Proverbs 16:32

I’ve been spending more time in prayer on my drive home each evening.  It’s an attempt to give the stresses of the day over to God.  Jesus promises peace for those who honestly seek it.

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest. Take my yoke upon you, and learn from me, for I am gentle and lowly in heart, and you will find rest for your souls. For my yoke is easy, and my burden is light.  Matthew 11:28-30

No matter what you are struggling with- just give it up.  Ask for the help of Jesus and move forward with confidence.

Those that love you the most deserve it.

Please pray for me to be a better husband and dad.  And let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless.

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Wounds from the battlefield

Carver kids Neyland 2015

I have a friend who has completed a couple of military tours in Afghanistan.  He suffered a battle scar that he’ll carry with him the rest of his life.  While the incident did not end his life, he’ll carry this visible, physical wound around for the rest of his days.

I have not talked with him about the specifics of the incident, but he’s said enough about it to lead me to two conclusions:  1)  it provides a constant reminder of the pain and suffering that war brings, and 2)  he’s decided to let go of any regret associated with the incident and move forward with a forgiving heart.

That’s hard to grasp, isn’t it?  He’s daily reminded of the painful experience, but he’s eyeing the future with a sense of peace and forgiveness.

We all have wounds.  While they might not all be physically apparent, they are often lingering beneath the surface.

Wounds from painful past experiences.  Wounds from times when we struggle to forgive others.

And wounds from not being able to forgive ourselves- which are perhaps the most painful of all.

How do we mend wounds?

First, we need to remember that we have a caring, loving God.

Humble yourselves, therefore, under the mighty hand of God so that at the proper time he may exalt you, casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.  1 Peter 5: 6-7

We also need to seek forgiveness- and grant forgiveness.

Be kind to one another, tenderhearted, forgiving one another, as God in Christ forgave you.  Ephesians 4: 32

And we need to fill wounds with prayer and other healthy activities…constantly seeking the presence of Jesus.

If you abide in me, and my words abide in you, ask whatever you wish, and it will be done for you.  John 15: 7

I pray that you allow Jesus to address your wounds.  Mine too.

Please let me know how I may pray for you this week.  God bless.

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Naked at the Soybean Festival

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I had the opportunity to return to my West Tennessee roots this week.  My schedule took me to the UT Martin campus for a series of meetings.  While it’s always good to be back “home”, this trip was especially fun because the annual Soybean Festival was taking place in downtown Martin.

The festival brings folks from all over the mid-south to Martin.  Thousands of people were milling around the square and the shops downtown.

While on campus yesterday afternoon, I ran into someone that I hadn’t seen in almost 30 years.  They were in town for the Soybean festival and we had 10 minutes to catch up.

He started telling his wife stories about our youth.  Stories from our middle and high school years.  Some of the stories I’d forgotten.  Others I had tried to forget.

I walked away from that conversation a little embarrassed.  Exposed.  Ashamed.  I felt..naked.

We all have aspects of our past (and present) that we are ashamed of.  Bad habits or old wounds that we hope time will cover and distance can erase.  I certainly do.

But even the hairs of your head are all numbered.  Matthew 10:30

But Jesus knows everything about us.  He knows our fears, doubts and weaknesses.  We can’t hide or outrun our sinful nature.  He knows it all.

He determines the number of the stars; he gives to all of them their names.  Psalm 147:4

Fortunately, we have grace.

For God so loved the world that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.  John 3:16

We are all sinners, but we have hope.

Why, even the hairs of your head are all numbered.  Fear not; you are of more value than many sparrows.  Luke 12:7

Jesus loves us- warts and all.  Thank God.

God bless you.

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Cussed out on Labor Day

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My heart aches for a little girl I saw earlier today.

I was running some errands and stopped in a local store.  I heard a disturbance an aisle over and quickly pushed my cart around the corner to investigate.  A father, obviously frustrated with his elementary-aged daughter, raised his voice and cussed her…right in front of about ten other customers in the store.

Cussed her out.  On Labor Day.

She was trying to decide which backpack she wanted and couldn’t make up her mind.  She couldn’t have been more than six years old.

He was obviously frustrated with her. And he let his frustration get the best of him…on Labor Day.

We’ve all been there.  The stresses of life can overwhelm us.  Work, family strife, illness, financial strain…the pressures surrounding us are great.  Who knows what this father was facing in his private life?  And who knows what sort of emotional toll his outburst had on his young daughter.

Come to me, all who labor and are heavy laden, and I will give you rest.  Matthew 11:28

Jesus wants to be our comfort in life.  He invites us to give our troubles to Him.

Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.  1 Peter 5:7

Tonight I will pray for that father.  I pray that he can find some peace in his life.  I will also pray for that small child- and that she feels some comfort in her home tonight.

Please pray for me to be a better husband and father- and that I can tap into the peace and comfort that Jesus grants so freely.

And let me know how I can pray for you.

God bless you.

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Racing under the lights

Bristol with B

I took my youngest son, Britton, to his first NASCAR race on Saturday night.  It was an awesome sight, as B and I watched the event with 160,000 other screaming spectators.

We started watching from the infield- up close and personal to the cars, drivers and their crews.  It looked like an overgrown bee hive, with dozens of brightly-colored team members swarming around each car. 

With the drop of the checkered flag the 43 cars started racing around the oval track at breakneck speed. The noise level of the cars and the capacity crowd was deafening. 

Britton asked a million dollar question:  “Dad- what if these stadium lights were to go out?  None of these cars have headlights.”

Thy word is a lamp unto my feet and a light unto my path. Psalm 119:105

Britton had asked a question that only someone with a clear, innocent mind of a child could ask. 

We had been close enough to the vehicles that he could tell that the headlights weren’t real. They were decals. If the lights of the stadium had gone out, the drivers, crew members and spectators would have been in grave danger. 

Isn’t life like this?  Our existence is a high-speed activity. We run from task to task without giving much thought to the meaning of what we are doing. We are simply racing around. When emergencies or troubles arise, we are ill-prepared to respond.

What about our headlights?

Again Jesus spoke to them, saying, “I am the light of the world. Whoever follows me will not walk in darkness, but will have the light of life.”  John 8:12

Jesus calls us to know him. We have an opportunity to be filled with the illuminating power of God’s word. 

Troubled?  

Casting all your anxieties on him, because he cares for you.  I Peter 5:7

Need hope?

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Jeremiah 29:11

Jesus is the light for the world. We are called to be filled with light (Matthew 5) and our only source for this is to seek Jesus. 

I struggle with just wearing a decal- when I need to be a light source. 

Pray for me to seek light each day. I need it. And please let me know how I may pray for you. 

God bless. 

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Orphans on an airplane

California 2015

The boys had no home.

I recently sat next to twin brothers on a flight originating from the west coast.  Their names were Eli and Jonathan.  They had just turned 12 years old.

I could tell that they were nervous about the flight.  They confessed this to me as I attempted to settle into my aisle seat.  They also mentioned that they were traveling by themselves.

Over the next hour I learned that Eli and Jonathan were flying to see their dad.  They had not seen them in over 10 years- since they were mere infants.  They had lived in various places over the course of their lives.  Grandparents, uncles, cousins, their birth mother and other relatives had provided temporary homes.  They had moved around frequently.

They had seen their mother engage in some bad decisions, and it was clear that they worried about her ability to manage relationships.

Their dad had been a distant figure in their lives…an occasional phone call from across the country.  Eli reached in his backpack and produced an old photograph of the brothers with their parents- probably taken when the boys were about a year old.  It was a well-worn picture, but it was obvious that it was precious to those boys.  It was the reminder of happier days for their small family.

Their father had called earlier in the year to see if they would like to spend the summer with him.  He had found a good job and was in a stable situation for the first time in years.  Eager to see him- the boys jumped at the chance to travel across the country to see what might be in store.  Eli told me that they had been praying about it.

Eli and Jonathan had hope.  Hope that a better, more stable life was available seven states away.  Hope that their dad would somehow be the missing link to a normal life.

Rejoice in hope, be patient in tribulation, be constant in prayer.  Romans 12:12

Eli and Jonathan had seen more hardship in their twelve years than most of us have seen in a lifetime.  Despite the trials, they had hope for better days.  Hope in a father.

We can learn a lesson from these twins.  Despite the pain and hardship of this world, we have hope through a Father that will never leave or forsake us.

For God so loved the world, that he gave his only Son, that whoever believes in him should not perish but have eternal life.  John 3:16

For I know the plans I have for you, declares the Lord, plans for welfare and not for evil, to give you a future and a hope.  Jeremiah 29:11

I pray that Eli and Jonathan had a great summer.  I also pray that their dad can provide stability and a good home for them.  Most of all, I pray for their future…for today, tomorrow and next year.

Please pray for me in my role as a husband, father and son.  And please let me know how I may pray for you.

God bless you.

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Everybody is Undefeated in August…

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It’s an exciting time of year in the Carver household, as August brings the anticipation of a new football season. We talk about the returning players on our favorite teams.  We feel the excitement surrounding new additions to the rosters.  And we spend a great deal of time discussing our pre-season predictions.

This might be our year (we always say…)…with a little luck and some great coaching.

Sometimes things go wrong.  An injury sidelines a key player.  Turnovers and penalties stall drives.  A sudden big play turns a sure victory into a crushing loss.  Our teams hit adversity from unexpected places and our dreams of being undefeated slip away.

I have said these things to you, that in me you may have peace. In the world you will have tribulation. But take heart; I have overcome the world.  John 16:33

Football is a great analogy for my life.  My hopes and dreams are easily hurt with adversity.  Stress, illness and unexpected conflict can take away joy from my days- and derail my plans.

Pain happens.  Hurt is a reality.  But there is hope.

With God we shall do valiantly; it is he who will tread down our foes.  Psalm 108:13

Jesus has promised to be with us and provide strength when we are weak.

For the Lord your God is he who goes with you to fight for you against your enemies, to give you the victory.  Deuteronomy 20:4

We’ve got the One who overcame sin and death to bring salvation to the world in our corner.

So no mater what the day throws at you, take heart that creator of the universe is with you.  Jesus loves me, this I know.

Let me know how I can pray for you this week.  And please pray for me.

God bless.

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Uninvited dinner guest

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Hollianne and I love to entertain. We enjoy having people over for dinners, cookouts or even hosting groups of our kids’ friends and teammates for a swim or an outdoor movie.  

We’ve recently met our match, however. 

In the wooded 40 acre wooded expanse behind our home lives a raccoon. A large, hungry raccoon. This creature waits until the dark of night before climbing our iron fence and rummaging through our backyard.  He turns over small tables and crawls over our furniture looking for a dropped morsel of food or a misplaced snack. 

He’s strong too, as he routinely moves barriers we’ve created to secure our trash. Daybreak often brings a task of picking up the remnants of his midnight snack- which he leaves littered across the yard. 

The raccoon even terrorizes our dog, Sky.  Sky refuses to go in the backyard after the sun sets. 

  
I can relate to this phenomenon in my personal life. There are uninvited traits and character flaws that expose my weakneses every day. Jealousy. Anger. Pride. These and other undesirable traits hide beneath the surface- waiting for the opportune moment to come out and hurt relationships with friends, co-workers and loved ones. 

So whoever knows the right thing to do and fails to do it, for him it is sin.  James 4:17

I know these traits exist, yet it’s a struggle to confront them.

If we say we have no sin, we deceive ourselves, and the truth is not in us. If we confess our sins, he is faithful and just to forgive us our sins and to cleanse us from all unrighteousness. If we say we have not sinned, we make him a liar, and his word is not in us.  1 John 1:8-10

Fortunately, we have help. 

Fear not, for I am with you; be not dismayed, for I am your God; I will strengthen you, I will help you, I will uphold you with my righteous right hand.  Isaiah 41:10

But he said to me, “My grace is sufficient for you, for my power is made perfect in weakness.” Therefore I will boast all the more gladly of my weaknesses, so that the power of Christ may rest upon me. For the sake of Christ, then, I am content with weaknesses, insults, hardships, persecutions, and calamities. For when I am weak, then I am strong. 2 Corinthians 12:9-10

I need to confront these traits and ask for help. I am weak, but He is strong. 

I can do all things through him who strengthens me.  Philippians 4:13

Please pray for me to have the courage to face those pieces of my nature that separate me from Jesus. Help me break down barriers that keep me from having good, meaningful relationships with others. 

And let me know how I may pray for you. 

God bless. 

Oh…and by the way…raccoons struggle to figure out the science behind a set of good bungee straps. Thank goodness. 

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